Boop! Finally, time to go and I know because Jayce is textin’ me; it has to be six p.m. “Hey bae, you ready for tonight?”
I can’t wait to feel him inside of me. I need to release this
frustration from dealin’ wit’ Raj and his bullshit. Jayce and I were in
love, happy, content; but why is it so painful being in love, why is
there so much pain in what’s supposed to happiness?
“Hey, Liv” Tori called out. “Whaaaaaaaat?” I exclaimed! “I’m leaving I’m leaving I’m leaving!” I can hear her Alexander Wang stilettos clicking towards my office.
just want to make sure you have the designs ready for my premiere next
Saturday. I’ve got to get Nate on makin’ the patterns!”
My eyes roll so far back in my head that I feel like I saw my hypothalamus! “I’ve nearly finished them! You do realize you’re a designer too huh?”
Tori leans over my desk seductively lickin’ her lips playin’ coy, “yeah, but you’re better than me and I need to focus on these actors” she pouts. “Ok ok ok Tori, “ I say annoyed. She runs up on me to hug me, I brush her off and head towards my car with my keys swingin’.
Blrlrlrlrlrl. Blrlrlrlrlrlr. “Liiiiiiiiv” Jayce expressed excitedly. “Bring dat ting to me!” His deep sonorous voice resonated deep within my being. My entire body began to tingle just at the thought of him squeezin’ on my ass and slappin’ it while hittin’ it from the back.
“I’m headin’ your way now bae! You need me to pick up anything?”
Nah, lady! Remember we’re supposed to go to dinner?” Jayce insisted!
“I know I know bae, jus’ makin’ sure. I can’t waaaaaait to lay my eyes on you! Muuuuuah, see you soon” I reply while hittin’ end.
I’ll be there in a minute lemme handle these kids! I gotta make sure
they’re straight, so I can just slide in, in the mornin’ as if I worked
late. They were used to it and that’s why I love Mrs. Graves, she minds
her bidness and takes great care of my babies.
“Moni I thought I told you to Facetime me when you all got home!” I holler in the phone.
“Um, we just got here mom! Mrs. Graves took us to Qdoba!”
“Ok babe, kiss your brother and sister for me, and call if YOU NEED ANYTHING!”
“Yuck, I’m not kissin’ Gio” she laughs.
“Just do what I said gal” I respond and hang up.
I love those kids to the life of me. There’s nothin’ in this world I wouldn’t do for them. That’s why I stay in this dead end marriage. I only have so much emotional energy each day, so I refuse to fight battles that don’t matter. I believed in our love. Hoped for our love. Prayed for our love at one time, but I will no longer put my life on hold waiting for Raj to love me right.
I’m not even out the car yet and he’s already bendin’ me over pullin’ my red lace La Perla thongs to the side. “Mmmmmmmmmm! Baby damn! Nice to see you too” I moan.
“We’re never goin’ to make it to The Capital Grille under these circumstances bae!”
“You do realize there are other restaurants in Atlanta huh?” he griped pullin’ away from me.
“Yes I know, but we also can’t just be gallivanting around town like I’m not married Jayce!”
“Whatever Liv! Look I’m not gonna continue to play second fiddle to a nigga that you don’t even like” he yells. “Let me go shower, I’ll be ready in thirty minutes. Have some wine or somethin’ and chill,” he sighs as he walks into his condo.
Ugh, I just really don’t have time for this! This is the place I come
to get away from the shit I have goin’ on at home and he wants to bring
this up now. I’m just gonna join him in the shower and maybe he will
forget that shit and move on to what we’re here for. Blrlrlrlrlrl.
Blrlrlrlrlrlr. Jayce’s phone lights up on the dresser. I’m not really
much into checkin’ his phone, but he never has his ringer on.
“Hey bae, can you hand me that” Jayce yells from the shower.
“Yeah, I got you” I holler back. Tessa! What the fuck is she doin’ callin’ Jayce of all people? How would they even know one another? I hand Jayce his phone and looks down surprised as fuck.
“Uh can you step out really quickly I need to take this” Jayce exclaims with a smirk on his face. I stand there kind of puzzled for a moment and I walk out the bathroom closing the door behind me.
“Hey baby, how is your trip?” I hear Jayce say through the door. Baby? What in the fuck is goin’ on here? Now, I know they met at Tori’s premiere too when I met Raj, but I never really paid any attention, because I was too smitten with Raj to care. They did exchange business cards, but I knoooooooow they haven’t been fuckin’ around since then! This can’t be possible! The terror from my brain begins to reach the pit of my stomach makin’ me queazy as fuck!
I can still hear him talkin’ to her as I move towards the bed to sit down. “I have a few loose ends to tie up over the weekend baby, but I promise we will see each other as soon as you get back! I miss you so much my love” Jayce says in the phone. At this point I can’t breathe, but I also can’t stay here. I gotta go! My side nigga is fuckin’ my husband’s side bitch. This is beyond me. This bitch wants every part of my life. What did I ever do to deserve this? I’m clumsily tryna gather my shit and run to my car before Jayce can get out of the shower, with tears rollin’ down my face.
I’m doin’ 100 down I-85 tryna get somewhere and breathe. I’m flustered and Jayce keeps callin’ my phone. He knows I heard that shit, but there’s nothin’ he can really say to me at this point! I’ve told him everything about me, about Raj, and even about Tessa, and the whole time he’s been fuckin’ her. I have no idea where I’m goin’, but I don’t wanna be bothered right now! My world just flipped upside down, and I am brutally broken.